Trivia Night

Thank you to all of our attendees for coming to our Trivia at Twilight event on Saturday night!  We all had a lot of fun and even raised some money for ABC. Congratulations to our winning team, “Pi R Screwed”, for a remarkable performance.  About 110 people were able to attend. The event was so successful that we will most likely do it again next year.

Trauma and Child Development

This article is a good article from the ChildTrauma Academy and discusses the impact on traumatic experiences on child development and how that then impacts the neurobiology development.  Check it out with the link below.

http://childtrauma.org/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/PerryPollard_Homeost_adapt_98.pdf

Trivia at Twilight

It’s not too late to test your knowledge! We still have seats and teams available for our Trivia at Twilight event Saturday, October 19th. It’s from 7-10 pm at the Knights of Columbus in Bloomington, and should be a lot of fun.  Teams of 8 will compete against each other for a very desirable prize.  Tickets are $15/person and include snacks and desserts.  A cash bar will be available.  You can form a team of 8 yourself or sign up as individuals that will be put in teams. You may register a team by calling ABC Counseling at (309) 451-9495, or email Amanda at ablack@abccounseling.org. We hope you can join us for this night of fun!

Talking to Your Kids About Sex

Talking about sex is often uncomfortable, but it can be especially so when you are talking to your children. Basic sex education is very important though and can help protect your children. We want our children to have the correct information and to know our values, and they will not get that from peers, teachers or media…only you as a parent. The conversation can take place at any time but it is most optimal as a preventative conversation rather than a reactive. Kids need to know things that are age-appropriate. Basically, preschoolers need to understand boundaries, correct names of private parts, privacy, safe adults, good and bad touches and good and bad secrets. Information about reproduction can be very basic. Utilizing books is an excellent way of discussing body parts and reproduction with young children. We highly recommend “Amazing You” by Dr. Gail Satlz.  For school-age children, expand the conversations above and include information on puberty for both sexes. Puberty conversations should start as early as 8 or 9, as many children’s bodies begin to change at that time. You can also add information about healthy relationships and be more specific on reproduction. Talking with school age kids while playing a game or doing another activity can make for a comfortable atmosphere and a better conversation. For middle schoolers, they should be fully aware of sexual behaviors, healthy media usage, protection and contraception, and healthy dating practices. Kids are discussing sex and seeing it in the media at this age, so more education means better choices on their part. For high school students, discussions should add dating violence and health sexual practices. For both middle school and high school students, car conversations are the best. They do not have to look at you and that often makes the conversation easier on everyone. Please realize that even if a kid went through health or sex education in school, they did not get everything. In fact, many do not listen well in that environment as they are embarrassed or uncomfortable in front of peers.  This is not a one-time conversation. It needs to happen over and over again.

No matter what though, emphasize safety and your values. Kids listen, even if they pretend they don’t, and if you are willing to have the hard conversation, they know they can come to you and trust you.

Other tips to help:

1. One way to help instill values or to correct what kids might think/say because of what other kids have told them is: “In our family…” You can distinguish that some families talk about or believe in things differently.

2. If kids ask questions, first find out what they already know and why they want to know that. Answer only what they asked. So, if a kid wants to know where babies come from, they may only want to know the actual place a baby comes out, not about sex itself. If they have further questions, let them know it’s okay to ask.

3. When you do discuss, remind kids that this is a private matter, and that it is not their job to teach other kids. See #1. Everyone does it differently, and hopefully that will prevent your child from being the “informant.”

4. If kids refuse the conversation, don’t give up. It is too important. Say, “I understand you are uncomfortable about this, but we need to discuss it. I need you to be educated so you can make good decisions. We will try again on Friday.” Don’t let it rest. Discomfort is not a reason to avoid the talk on anyone’s part.

There are many great books on the topic, so please check in with ABC staff for additional referrals or suggestions on how to handle the conversation.

By: Teri McKean

 


Expanding Services in Tazewell County

Did you know that ABC Counseling has expanded their offender counseling in Tazewell County? ABC Counseling has a newer program called Back on Track II that works with medium to high-risk youth on probation in Tazewell County. Clients who are moderate to high-risk on probation include youth with multiple criminal offenses ranging from charges of battery, burglary, truancy, etc. Many of these clients have been resistant to previous interventions. They may be struggling with mental health diagnoses and/or have barriers they face while at home such as poverty or other family members who have had involvement in the Department of Corrections.

This is an intensive counseling program to prevent youth from entering the Department of Corrections or a residential treatment center. Some of the youth in this program are receiving aftercare services since being discharged from a residential treatment center. These youth attend once a week individual counseling, once a week group counseling (with a parent parallel group), and twice a month family counseling (meeting once a month in the home). This is a hefty time commitment, but if involved in all aspects of the program it can lead to positive benefits over time. The youth have also been able to participate in some community outreach as a group which has been a positive experience for all involved. Program outcomes are still in the early stages at this time. The therapist involved in this program has a smaller caseload in an effort to provide all services and support needed for each youth and family involved. Often times, individual sessions have been held at the schools where the youth attends. The Parent Parallel Group has benefited from learning more tips based on the Love and Logic curriculum and exploring topics such as empathy, resilience-building, communication, and feelings expression from a parent perspective.

By: Sarah Maurer

Tips to Recover from Traumatic Events

Have you or a loved one been through a traumatic event and need help managing emotions? If so, please see the below article by the American Psychological Association.

http://www.apa.org/helpcenter/recovering-disasters.aspx

 

Adoption Program Update

This summer has brought sunshine and adoptive placements to ABC. With two great placements in June, and one in July, we hope to continue helping families grow through adoption. Due to an increase in waiting potential adoptive families through the last couple of years, we have stopped accepting new families that are solely depending on ABC for a placement. This is the first time that ABC has had to limit our waiting families, but we want to give our current waiting families the best possible chance to bring a beautiful adopted child into their loving homes. We stopped accepting new families this Spring, and are hopeful that with our continued placements, we will be able to bring new families into the program again sometime soon. We are forming new relationships with national agencies and trying new strategies to bring potential birth mothers to ABC.  As you may have noticed, there are no longer 2 separate websites for ABC’s counseling program and adoption program. We have launched our new website in July, thanks to a great deal of hard work. If you have any questions about our adoption program, please contact Amanda or Julie at (309) 451-9495, or via email at ablack@abccounseling.org or jmendez@abccounseling.org.

Using Play and Play-Based Techniques in Therapy with Children and Adolescents

Why does my child play games and color pictures with their counselor?

Of the over 500 clients that ABC Counseling has served so far this year, nearly half were under 12 years old, and almost one quarter were under 8 years old. Due to the young age of many of our clients, traditional “talk therapy” is neither appropriate nor effective. Most children, and many adolescents, lack the critical thinking, symbolic awareness, attention span, and capacity for metacognition (that is, thinking about how you think) to benefit from traditional therapeutic approaches. Therefore, many therapists, including those at ABC, often utilize play-based therapeutic interventions.

Play is considered the language of children. Just as we would provide services in Spanish to a client who speaks Spanish, it makes sense to use play with children who communicate and learn through play. Play has many benefits in the therapy setting. For example, many children who are victims of trauma can express, consciously or unconsciously, their feelings, problems, questions, and fears. A four-year-old child who does not have the words to say she feels afraid may find it easier to talk by acting through a puppet, doll, or miniature figurine. A nine-year-old boy who is angry with his parents might act out his aggression by pretending to be a boxer and hitting a punching bag. These activities might feel like play to a child, but their therapeutic benefits are significant and lasting.

Children in therapy can learn new social skills, develop emotional regulation, and achieve mastery over their trauma, all through play. For example, some young children feel empowered when they can draw a picture of the person who abused them, and then tear up the picture and throw it away. It gives them a sense of control that many children lose when they are victimized. In addition, many therapists utilize play-based interventions to enhance relationships between family members. Have you ever been asked to join a session and play a cooperative game with your child? Did it allow you and your child to practice sharing, turn-taking, listening, or other social skills? You were participating in play therapy! Other ways that play therapy can help children is to boost a child’s self-confidence and self-esteem, prepare for life changes through role-playing, learn coping skills to better manage stress, and develop moral reasoning and a sense of self.

There are many ways that play therapy can be used in counseling with children. Reading and writing stories, listening to music, writing and acting out puppet shows, and playing with dolls are common techniques. The use of sand trays and miniature figurines is also a unique but effective modality for many children and adults. Many common games, such as Go Fish, Red Light/Green Light, and Concentration, can be adapted for learning social skills or appropriate boundaries. Drawing, coloring, painting, and other art-based therapy tools are often very appropriate for children who enjoy creative activities. Even something as simple as building with blocks, working on a jigsaw puzzle, or shaping play-doh can teach a child self-control, communication, cooperation, and problem-solving skills. So next time your child tells you that they “played” in counseling, they just might be telling the truth – and you can reassure yourself that they might have learned something, too.

For more information about the Association for Play Therapy, visit www.a4pt.org. If you would like to know more about how your child’s counselor might be using play-based activities in treatment, just ask them!

Written by: Melissa Box, LSW, Sexual Abuse Therapist

Trivia at Twilight

So you think you’re smarter than a 5th grader?  Or maybe just smarter than the other tables.  Either way you’ll want to come out for a night of fun Trivia at Twilight.  Join ABC Counseling on October 19th from 7-10 p.m. at the Knights of Columbus in Bloomington to show off all that useless knowledge you’ve been storing.  Teams of 8 will compete against each other for a very desirable prize.  Tickets are $15/person and include appetizers and desserts.  A cash bar will be available.  You can form a team of 8 yourself or sign up as individuals that will be put in teams. You may register a team by calling ABC Counseling at (309) 451-9495, or email Amanda at ablack@abccounseling.org. We hope you can join us for this night of fun!

Thank You!

KidCard4Thank you to everyone who joined us or contributed to our 9th annual Gifts From The Heart.

We enjoyed good food, good drink, lots of great auction items, and most of all seeing all of our friends and supporters.

 

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A special thank you to our sponsors:

State Farm Bank

Country Financial

GROWMARK

Illinois Farm Bureau

Little Jewels

1st Farm Credit Services

Commerce Bank

Roanoke Benson Community Bank

Integrity Technology Solutions